The Diary of a Lady - 3

Spellcheck is an escapist, who will do anything to remain untouched by the harsh realities of life. This is her rambling diary, written exclusively for The Crystal Ship

The book had a pink and black cover, but that's all I can remember. It was a compilation of short pornographic stories set in 19 ^th Century England. Behind the staunch Victorian façade, he spanked her little fanny, as the horses snorted in disdain.

And my boyfriend and I would read those wonderfully sordid passages to each other. We never knew who the original owner of the book was. Another flatmate remembered it, his friend had 'thumped' through it (the stains were still there); their girlfriends blushed coyly when we mentioned the book. It was our dirty little secret that bound us together in the termite-ridden flat with green and blue walls.

That was years ago. The boyfriend, I married. The flatmate became a self-absorbed, money-obsessed non-entity. His friend exiled himself on the high seas. I never saw him again. One girlfriend died. The other became my friend.

And the book? It's nowhere to be found. But in honour of its memory, I will name my future children Dick and Fanny.