The new Vicar was up early one Sunday morning, walking around his new parish, after leaving his wife in bed with the Sunday papers, her cup of tea, and a pack of cigarettes. One of the old villagers came up to him and said. "Good morning, Vicar, how be you and the wife?"
The Vicar said, "Good morning my man, I am fine, the wife is fine also. I left her in bed smoking."
The villager said, "Arr, Vicar, that's the way to fuck 'em!"
Oh dear George W is at it again with his verbal rubbish. Bush took his head out of his arse long enough to utter: ''I heard somebody say, ‘Where's Mandela?' Well, Mandela's dead because Saddam Hussein killed all the Mandelas.''
Needless to say Mandela’s spokesperson has placated South Africa and the rest of the world by confirming that the old boy is still going strong.
Munich Mayor Christian Ude opened the biggest piss-up of the year when he ordered the tapping of the first beer barrel, the ritual kick-off for the 174th edition of the Oktoberfest.
So does that mean all the denizens of Bahrain will be heading to the Sherlock Holmes for the usual fare of barely-passable beer and even worse women?
Anyway here’s some Oktoberfest trivia for you to mull while you keep checking the clock to see if you can piss-off from work without anyone knowing.
As if there weren’t enough bikes on the road Suzuki Motorcycles India has announced that it will come up with a new 150cc motorbike variant in February next year, according to PTI.
According to the report a spokesperson from Suzuki Motorcycles said that models like Heat (125cc) and Zeus (125cc) were targeted to provide Indian customers a refreshing new feel in the 125cc commuter segment.
While Heat was targeted towards excessive bike users, Zeus was more for young college students and executives the spokesperson said.
What on earth is an “excessive bike user”? Is it someone who goes to bed with his bike, or occasionally taps the exhaust (hey it’s been known to happen). Be that as it may, no more stupid kids with a wish to end their meager and miserable lives can obtain the tool to do so.
I think we should ban all bikes under 500cc, then at least if you kill yourself you can look good while you do it.
The 46-year-old Oscar-winning actor was travelling with his girlfriend Sarah Larson (seen in picture with Clooney) at the time of the crash in Palisades. Larson, 28, suffered a broken foot in the accident, Clooney's spokesman Stan Rosenfield said.
The couple was treated at the Palisades Medical Center and later released the statement added.
